Regarding the wacky side effects of drugs that appear in approximately .014% of users: It turns out that I am the .014% of users. Radiating back pain and headache over the right eye? Got it. Nausea, fatigue, and sleep disturbances? Right on schedule. Dry mouth, indigestion, and metallic taste in one’s mouth? I’ll take one of each. Weight gain and gas? Darn tootin’.* If I were physically able to have an erection lasting more than four hours, I am sure I would have that, too.
The lingering gastritis (from back in December) had me on Prilosec for several weeks, and then Aciphex for the past month. The Prilosec sort of worked and the Aciphex REALLY works, but not without having just about every non-fatal side effect available. The excessive gas and weight gain have been particularly noteworthy. The fine print might as well read: Warning! Some users may become profoundly unattractive as a result of taking Aciphex. Please consult your physician if symptoms last longer than aaaah! Could you maybe just read this in the dark? And light a match while you’re at it.
Anyway, the pound a week weight gain has really pissed me off. Despite tripling my physical activity (and them some) and getting my diet right back where it should be, I’m still gaining. I thought I was done with weight loss mode, but alas, here I find myself in weight loss mode just to keep it to a pound a week. It sucks, and I am hoping that once I get off this stuff maybe I’ll get some retroactive benefits of all of the weight loss behavior. Also, complaining to the internet has to make this better. It just has to. Otherwise, why would so many people do it?
So, as of yesterday, my dose has been halved, and in another couple of weeks (pounds?) I hope to halve it again and shortly thereafter be completely free of it. In the mean time, COMPLAINT.
In related news, last night Scott and I heard an add for an allergy medication with the most awesome side effect information ever. “Extended use of [whatever] may cause dry mouth, strange taste, dizzyness… and so on.” Does that mean if I take this stuff for allergies, I may start wearing polka dots and plaid together? Or develop a strong urge to put Elvis wallpaper in my bathroom? Now, those are some side effects I could handle.
*pun intended.
