Monthly Archives: September 2009

All this fasting really works up an appetite.

I’m a little wifty here at hour twenty-one of fasting. It’s not bad. This is the first time I’ve fasted (for Yom Kippur at least) in thirteen years, and before that, I don’t really remember ever fasting for the whole day. Teaching at the JCC has brought me back around to my Jewyjewness, in a good [...]
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You. With the bot.

Is this really how it’s going to happen? You’re going to hurl spam at all 298 posts on this blog? I tell you what. I’ll buy your viagra if you sit here for an hour tonight deleting those 250 comments of yours that need to be moderated, and the 250 messages they’ll generate in my [...]
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Two for the Road

I. I keep seeing a bumper sticker that says, “If you think you’re perfect, try walking on water.” It annoys me, not because of the sentiment so much, but because it doesn’t make any sense. What does walking on water have to do with perfection? I have to think that when we’re running down the list [...]
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Fun with Google Analytics

Following are all of the keywords that have led people to my blog since I set up google analytics over the summer. I could bring on the quips, but I think the list stands on its own as a work of… something. 1. lauren flax 2. green and yellow shoes 3. “lauren flax” 4. “people born in 1988″ 5. [...]
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Weekly Writing Assignment – Argument

This week’s weekly writing assignment was to write dialogue for people having an argument or conflict. I went reeeeeal classy on this one. — “Oh my GOD, would you please contain yourself?” Leanne stood at the door to the kitchen with her arms crossed. “What do you mean?” Frank was tying up the garbage bag. “I could hear you [...]
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Abandoning Navigational Instruments

Earlier today I mentioned to an acquaintance that I am teaching at the Park Heights JCC, and we had a little chat about Pikesville, the place that doesn’t let you leave. Ever. No matter where you go, or what you do, it sucks you back in. I moved away when I was eight years old, [...]
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Silver Lining

The silver lining of today’s unrelenting rain clouds was the first sexy boot wearing of the season. The other silver lining was the MWA anthology party this evening. Sometimes the right message pops up at just the right time. This time, the message was that writing is tremendously risky and very brave. What makes a [...]
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Intellectual Maturity

It has been said that the mark of intellectual maturity is being able to hold conflicting views simultaneously. Flash class started last week, and on the first day the instructor -let’s call him Helmut- was somewhat worked up over having shared a computer with a student who had the flu. He talked about the syllabus a [...]
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Labor Day Weekend, Pictorial

What was planned: a jaunt to Saugerties for a lovely, casual, Labor Day weekend wedding. What happened: sewage took a jaunt up the pipes and necessitated a costly, emergency replacement of the line out to the street. I recognize that this isn’t interesting to anyone who isn’t me, but for $4,400, I want pictures. And [...]
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Arm and Yammer

All this shit happened. Literally, all this shit happened. I’ve been trying to write about the JCC making me feel like an asshole, and my one great massive phobia making me feel like an asshole. Then sewage started backing up into the house, and it turns out the whole line from the house to the [...]
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