I.
In a yoga class a few weeks ago, a teacher read this from Krishnamurti:
Krishnamurti
“Immaturity lies only in total ignorance of self. To understand yourself is the beginning of wisdom.”
As a kid, I was praised for being more mature than the other kids, and while that may have been true, somehow I got my aloofness all tangled up in that idea of maturity. While the rest of my friends were busy doing all of the “immature” things that force people to grow up -falling in love and so on- I was just watching it go by from a distance. And really, I got stuck. In my early or mid-twenties I realized that emotionally, in many ways, I was years behind my friends and all of their drama. I think I have made up time since then, but I still think of myself as being pathologically immature sometimes. Although I know it is not true, there is occasionally this insecurity that nags at me, one of the less kind voices in my head, that says that if I were more mature I would enjoy being more normal, and enjoy normal milestones, like having kids, and so on. Although the sentiment in the quote is nothing new, it is a reminder that what I sometimes beat up on myself for as immaturity is really the opposite. I know enough about who I am and about how the world works to know that some of the things about me that look ridiculous are just… true.
II.
This quote from Ben Franklin pops up in the next issue of “Smile, Hon.”
“Either write something worth reading or do something worth writing.”
No commentary, I just love this.
III.
No to long ago I was remembering this scene from When Harry Met Sally – the dialogue that starts around 2:15.
And after I remembered it, I realized that I am older than that.
IV.
CCY got boxes and boxes of samples of YogiTea, specifically the Slim Tea and the Peach Detox. The Slim Tea is a green tea blend, and although I don’t like green tea (which I think may get me kicked out of the new age yoga person club), I do like this tea, and there is only a teeny bit of caffeine in it, so I can tolerate it. I don’t know that it actually suppresses my appetite, but it is tasty. The peach detox tea is nice, too, but I think it would more aptly be named “Peeach Detox.” Good heavens.
RSS
Does aloofness equate with vacuum of experience? Are there other intensities, other fires of transformation, than drama visible to the eye? Aloofness is a different path with other blessings, other injuries. The phrase is, perhaps, “to grow up too fast,” as if growth occurred in one direction. I am becoming younger as I age. Perhaps you recognize this phenomenon?
The path of wisdom isn’t necessarily one of austerity. And, the work is to cultivate your self, your essential nature. As you would whittle a shape from wood, you discern the indestructible soul in your perceptions. What of unnecessary milestones, or non-essential normalcy?
May we grow younger!
Thanks for your words, Darrell. That is just the point, that aloofness really has nothing to do with maturity. The two are totally different ideas, but as I was growing up, they got tangled, and led me down some paths that were, let’s just say, full of learning.
I rarely get caught up in any business about normality these days, but there are times, particularly during transitions, when I think that it would be easier to take a more conventional path. What I am finding as I spend a little more time on this planet, is that many of the milestones in adulthood are external: not one’s own accomplishments and growth, but one’s children’s accomplishments and growth. I have my own, of course, but during transition when things get a little bumpy, it’s easy to feel a little lost, a little unrelatable.
Regardless, I am ages and ages younger than I was when I was young, and it ROCKS. I don’t think youth is wasted on the young, I think free will is wasted on the old!